I was thinking about my first Waffle House
experience this
morning...which took place only a month ago in
Nashville. Elena and I
went before she dropped me off at the airport...I
don't remember what I
had to eat (never a good sign), but I remember
snippets of good
conversation...actually more I remember good
conversation being
interupted by the guy behind the counter. That too,
became part of the
joy of the experience and I learned to take the
chill pill. He was (in
Elena's terms) as hick as they come...when he
discovered that I was
heading to the airport, he started talking about how
much luggage thay'd
been misplacing over there..."some colored lady was
bawling on t.v.
today about how her baggage was lost, and it had all
her christmas
presents in it. I felt very sorry for her." On and
on it went...he told
Elena that he believed she was the prettiest girl
he'd ever seen...and
that I reminded him of Shirly Temple. We left with
relief on our hearts,
but at the same time we enjoyed it I think...maybe.
It was wierd, but
hey...he told Elena she had to not let that be the
last time she came
in...and that I was to come back when I visited
again. Holland is so not
like that. Anyways.

I guess that's all I feel like posting...I worked
today, and I've
mentioned before how slow it is...so I won't bring
it up again. Actually
today was very nice, my 'tude' was probably in the
correct position.
Co-worker John keeps all his weights and lifting
gear in the corner of
the shop, and had me lifting by the end of the day.
I should sleep, for
tomorrow I know I will feel the pain. I don't want
to sleep though...I
want to drink coffee, and hang out with friends for
hours upon hours.
Maybe tomorrow.

Grace be upon you.

I <3 heart<3 Gregory Hines...

My dad shared something this morning that I found
quite interesting. He
was talking of the whole "Opposites Attract" thing.
He and my mom being
quite opposite are proof of truth in the theory.
Then he started
wondering how it affects the offspring of the said
opposite
mates...instead of having turmoil on the surface (in
conflict of
opinion, or a misunderstanding of emotion) the kids
have the turmoil of
opposition in themselves, having taken on traits of
both parents.

That made terrific sense to me. Also painted my day
with a little peace.

Well it's Monday morning and instead of engaging
myself in what needs to
be done, I thought I'd reflect on the
weekend...because in all actuality
I'd rather still be living the weekend. Eh-heh.

Pappa's birthday
was on Saturday...he
turned 40...and asked for a low key celebration. He
wanted the weekend
to himself, so he could get some more work done in
the basement. Niah
and I got up early (not as early as dad did), and
took dad out to
breakfast at the Windmill...ahh what a memory. Dad
got the usual
hashbrown omlet, and we sat in the smokey atmosphere
with joy abounding.
Niah and I ate too....but what pappa got was more of
a memory...I'm
giving being a vegetarian a trial run...mostly just
starting by cutting
out red meats...we'll see how it goes, I'm not into
offending people
because of misunderstood eating habits, so I
dunno...Niah got some
monster plate of pancakes, and homemade bread...it's
all really good
breakfast there, so we were all content. I had to
work at 10, and we
still had like an hour and a half to kill before
that, so we headed over
to Lemonjello's...Matt was the only one there, he
was still baking
muffins...it was such a warm comforting atmosphere.
Yeah...

Isaiah and I took a tumble in the snow yesterday,
neither of us had snow
pants on so it didn't last that long. I loved it
though, being all burly
in our poofy winter coats...making snow angels. I
get rather emotional
about spending times like these with my youngest
brother. As I fore see
the future involving a step away from home for me, I
know these moments
are only become distant memories, instead of daily
happenings. So now I
find myself taking mental photgraphs of his front
toothless smile, and
writing down his "little guy talk" phrases...
"Jonanna, I just need you
to stay here in my home! You've been leaving
hundreds of times!" Yeah he
pretty much makes me melt.

We also, all of us Bystroms, made the trek out to
Grandville...making an
attendance to Mars Hill church. The triple x church
guys were there...it
was a beautifully inspiring time. I still struggle
with confliction over
the fact that church is so entertainment based, but
if I look at it like
a conference then it's all good :)...the worship
band got all our
attention by playing a wonderful rendition of
"Apocalypse Please" by
Muse. Just the instrumentals...no singing, and it
was very good, but
even coming to that conclusion pained me :).
Anyways...the guys I
mentioned before spoke, and encouraged the
congregation to take risk in
walking and following Jesus. That's greatly
summerized, by my lack of
concentration....I have to go check on my
laundry...momma
just reminded me.
But check them out
Craig and Mike ...I like
them so much I
thought I'd give 'em a plug in my xanga! I bet
they're completely
honored.

*one more thing*



Beauty fades my friends. Work on your hearts, you'll
be glad when your
face is wrinkly and your buns sag.

I'm listening to the weather report. It's better
than watching divorce
court. Apparantly no one cares about maintaining
their hot tub during
these winter months. co-worker John told me that he
didn't even turn the
cash register on until 2 'o clock yesterday
afternoon. Yeah that's how
slow it is, and I have contentment issues. All I can
think about is the
billion other places I'd like to be, the trillion
other things I could
be accomplishing. I'm getting a glimpse of what
could be me 30 years
from now if I never do anything I want all in the
name of
practicality...I'll be 48 having a slow day at work
(some secure job
with good benefits...) and wallowing in regrets.
I'll have none of it.

I think my mental tangents are due to a lack of
rest...I had horrible
dreams all night, and after a particularly menacing
one, I woke up to
soft noises in the kitchen. It was 4 am, and who
ever was, did not want
to be heard. All the rustling was caused by a slip
of the foot or some
other clumsy mistake...my heart pounding, I tried to
work through the
fog of dreams and hazed reality...of course it was
nothing...maybe
nothing. I kind of stiffened when I thought of
sneaking out of my creaky
loft bed, grabbing my cell phone, and making a mad
dash for the stairs (
causing me to cross the kitchen ). I didn't move for
a long time...when
I talked myself into bravery, and made the sneaky
trek upstairs, no one
was in the kitchen, but I thought they could've been
downstairs by then.
I got to my parents room, after checking to see that
Niah and Isaiah
were safe....and I found my mom asleep alone.
Relief...my dad was up. I
went back to bed a bit perturbed with him....I knew
he was simply struck
by motivation. When next I woke up, it was 8 am. I
went to the basement
to see what he'd been doing. He's working on a
sitting room down there
complete with sleeper sofa, and he sorted mounds of
laundry. It's
looking darn good, and I'm inspired by his passion.
Motivation is a
funny thing. I'd rather it leave my sleep alone from
now on, but at the
same time...I'm sick of the way I've been ignoring
the call. Mostly in
the area of consistancy. I am motivated only by the
large picture, not
the intimate details of painting it.

"Joe, can we stop at Lemonjello's and get some 'love
buzz'?"

"Yeah sure, but why?"

"Because the coffee we have been drinking tastes
like ass."

Laughter erupted. I love my mom.

A beautiful weekend...filled with everything from
sorrow to happiness. I
am currently being distracted by an ad that claims
if I "shoot the
outlaw" I'll win a free ipod...I would like an ipod,
but I'm afraid of
getting ripped off. I mean what if I get shot
instead?

Yesterday, we bystrom people finally exchanged our
gifts to one another.
We normally wait until Epiphany (three kings day on
Jan. 6), but
Thursday would not have been conducive to enjoyment
of a holiday. So we
made it happen yesterday. It was really nice, I got
Niah a pair of
stellar shoes that didn't fit him. But the journal I
gave him did.
Isaiah is enjoying the art kit, and sweatshirt I
decorated for him. Mom
will make Pho Ga today and serve it in the new
oversized soup bowls I
found her. Poppa's shoes are being tested for
comfort in the house
today, before he will wear them outside.

I have two new beautiful coats (my family knows my
fetish for classy
shoes and vintage coats...I think I could wear a
different coat everyday
of the week now.) A pair of amazing mittens that my
mom made, I told her
that she has to make some and sell them on my
website. An itunes
card...which I hinted heavily for *blushes*. I've
purchased three songs
so far...any suggestions on what I should buy next
will be appreciated.
I want to broaden my knowledge of good
music...anyways. All this was
topped off with a surprise in the basement...dad
told me there was a
gift he left there because he ran out of time to
wrap it in. He gave me
intructions on where to find it, I put my slippers
on and went into "the
pit" as we lovingly call our michigan basement.
Normally cluttered with
laundry, thrift store purchases that never were put
to use, piles of
books, yer momma...ect. My breathe was stolen from
me when I entered the
back room, not because of a mustly smell either. A
section of the mess
had dissappeard, replaced now with an area rug,
beautiful work
table...shelves and such. All to house sewing tools
and materials...all
for me to work in. I have two rooms that are mine in
our little house
now. I love them both, instead of dreading one. :) I
cry because I'm
blessed. I'm gonna go get myself moved in.

I thought about it on Wednesday, and it made me
cry...I tried to think
about it yesterday, but it was just a little to
busy, I put it off until
the next day. Today let the thoughts dart between
walls of busyness. A
year has passed since Claudette died...I met her at
the PUSH
apprenticeship in '03. I wasn't sure how to deal
with her blunt remarks
at first... I remember talking to her about how
wierd it was for me to
be away from my family and not know anyone...I told
her that I relied on
them for so much. She kind of bristled at that
remark "No, not me. I
rely on God only." I tried to defend myself gently
outloud, while inside
I was saying "yeah don't we all." It didn't take
that long to realize
how deeply true that statement was of her...she
never showed otherwise
in her behavior. Jesus was/is her beloved. Everyone
else knew it too...

Me and my clingy insecurites learned a lot from her
small mexican
frame...I heard her stories of leaving her family in
Mexico (whom she
loved a lot), to become a "missionary to the
states". She was just that.
My thoughts are choppy here...

The best memory I have of her, is when I partnered
with her in class. We
were to do this mirror type exercise...our hands
touching, with one
person leading and the other following. The idea was
to make it look
like no one was leading, so not only did you need a
good "speaker" but a
good "listener". I put on my insecure face and told
her to lead,
beacause I didn't know what to do. She took me on
the most beautiful
ride ever...I learned so much from her confidence.
It definately rooted
deeply into God. I want to be like that. She left so
many amazing
friendships behind, and my heart aches for them
today. This post doesn't
serve anything justice...but I wanted to remember.