I left Elise with a hug, tightening every muscle in
my eye so as to
prevent tearing. Kissing the Jude boy, and taking
one last glance at the
little flower they call Esme'....I left to catch my
train into the city
where I would catch another train to Holland. I sat
down on the top deck
by a window...with no one else around. Then I let
myself cry. It's not
that Elise would think I'm a dork for crying, but I
get sick of always
doing it. It was a happy time and I somehow always
manage to cry.
Something about the way this young married couple
live their life
together always touches me...something about the way
conversation flows
rivets me...something about the brightness I see in
their kids eyes
makes me all joyful.

Yeah they're part of the family.

So anyways. I had to take a metra train downtown
Chicago from the
suburb Isaiah and Elise live in...I ride the metra
knowing that when I
got
off I would need to find the amtrak union station.
Elise told me that if
I was having trouble reading the maps I should just
take a taxi (even
though we knew it was within walking distance) and
tell them I needed
the 'union station'. I get off the metra and I'm
like...no thanks, don't
feel like getting lost in Chicago today! So I waited
a total of 5
seconds for a taxi, and then hesitated...I felt so
awkward climbing into
a car alone with a stranger driving. It almost felt
dirty :)
I fumbled with my luggage longer than was probably
neccesary, then said
"union station please". He then looked at me
dumbfounded and asked...

"you mean that one over there?" He was pointing at a
building across the
street.
I laughed in surprise and said...
"Well probably! Is that the union station really?"
"Yeah it is." said he without a smile.

I was laughing at myself as I again fumbled to get
out of the awkward
space, and smiled all the way to the union
station...only when I got
there did the realization that it was still the
metra station, I needed
amtrak. I must have been wearing confusion as fear
on my face when this
big black guy came up to me...

"what you looking for ma'am?"
When i hesitated he asked "Where you need to go?
Amtrak?"
"Yeah I need to catch a train to michigan."
"Well if you buy me a chinese dinner I'll show you
the amtrak station."

And we began walking together...I dropped my jacket
once without
noticing and he caught it for me, and was annoyed
that the taxi driver
was not more helpful (I
freely relayed the embarrassing mess to him)...he
insisted though that
walking in chicago was better than a taxi...plus he
was happy that I
would be paying for his fried rice w/pork.

We stopped at a corner and he pointed me the rest of
the way...I then
asked him how much a dinner would cost and he
replied:

"Eight dollars sis, but that's not including a
coke."

I thought well I'll give him ten...that's more than
generous for a
walking guide. Then I thought...I'll give him 5 more
because he's just
so nice and actually has made me feel quite comfy
here in a scary city.
I handed him the $15 dollars...and he said:

"How about five more. I got kids."

I gave it to him, knowing all the time I was being
taken advantage of.
Then his eyes lit up and he was like:
"Thank you sis! can I give you a hug?" We embraced
and I started walking
away. He called after me...

"I love you sis!"
"Thanks! I love you too!" Yelled I.

Then I was on my way, and bought my ticket and
waited an hour for my
train. Yeah pretty much. I think I've thought about
this whole
experience way more than him, but...
it made me thankful for being as sheltered as I am.
In a way I think it
gives me more courage to respond in such situations.
I saw what people
were like trying to survive in their 'big
world'...but what's the use of
being aware and cultured when we only stare at our
feet in
desensitization? If that's even a word.

Hey check out these cool tunes by "I wish I could
have bought you a
helicopter"

http://www.purevolume.com/iwishicouldhaveboughtyouahelicopter>
. A
friend of mine was in on the action, and I think
it'd be cool if we
could help them on their way to Iceland. Please make
all checks payable
to me. :) Listen and enjoy.